Finding Healing in Illness and Death

Illness and death is a normal part of life. Physical death is inevitable, while illness is likely to be something we all experience, whether personally or with a loved one. I have experienced my fair share of both. A few of those experience consist of:

• The loss of multiple friends, due to different unexpected deaths (all between the ages of 17 to 26 years old).
• The passing of my niece while I was serving my mission in 2013. 
• And most recently, the passing of both of my grandmothers, not even a month apart, earlier this year, both of who died from illness rather than old age.

I would be lying if I said I didn't mourn these losses. I would be lying if I said I did not feel excruciating pain. I shed a lot of tears, and had many sleepless nights. Some hurt worse than others, but each experience still hurt. Sometimes I relive the pain, but that does not mean I cannot find healing.

Since the passing of my grandmothers is the most recent, I will focus on that experience. My paternal grandmother passed away from cancer, just weeks before I was planning on returning home for the summer. My maternal grandmother passed away just a week or so after I had returned home. I was by her bedside when she died, and the tears poured out as if they would never cease. I was very close with both of my grandmothers, and couldn't help but feel for a moment that they were lost too soon.

My Grandma and Grandpa Freeman at the hospital before her passing.

Holding my Grandmother Hansen's hand shortly before her passing.

I was sad, but I am not broken, and I want to share some of the reasons why:

• I allow myself to mourn, and think of those I have loved and lost.
• I have an understanding and testimony of the Lord's plan of salvation.
• My testimony has helped me develop an eternal perspective.
• I turn to the Savior and utilize His Atonement.

When we mourn, it more fully shows our capacity to love. Elder Russell M. Nelson once said:

"Mourning is one of the deepest expressions of pure love. It is a natural response in complete accord with divine commandments: 'Thou shalt live together in love, insomuch that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die' (D&C 42:45).... The only way to take sorrow out of death is to take love out of life."

To correlate what Elder Nelson has said with the Plan of Salvation and the Atonement of Jesus Christ: it is because of the Savior's love for us that He atoned for us. Love was His strength. He made the ultimate sacrifice so that we would not have to endure these hardships alone. He makes it possible for us to return to our Father in Heaven, and be united with our family and loved ones again. It is through Him that we find healing for all that we have done, and all that we have endured in this life.

With this understanding, I am able to have a more eternal perspective, and that is because I know that the pain I feel is not in vain. Rather, it is for my growth and benefit. It is because of an eternal perspective that I am able to know that I will see my loved ones again, and that I can find healing in hard times. 

In closing of this blog entry, I want to share one final quote:

"As we realize that the blessings of the Atonement extend to all of life's suffering and that the Lord truly understands our personal situations, we can more fully turn to the Savior in times of illness or death and accept His invitation: 'Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls' (Matthew 11:28-29)" (Hawkins, pg. 245).

My prayer is that you may all find the same healing I have been able to find as you turn to the Lord, and that what I have shared may be of help and/or a good reminder to you in your times of need.